Dear Time...a letter of MODERATION.
Dear Time,
I'm a self confessed list maker. I like writing things down to simply cross them off moments later. I like the accomplishment of a completed list and a fresh start with the turn of the notepad.
All my life really, I've been making lists. And as a result, all of my life, I have been driven to complete tasks a quickly as possible. The check marks are endless. I complete one list after another. Even when I was young, the perfectionist in me wanted to get as much done in as little time as possible.
The other day my mom brought up a funny story about me in the 3rd grade. As the story goes, I used to dress myself for school the night before, sleep in my outfit, and roll out of bed ready to go in less than a minute the next day. Perhaps this speaks of my love for sleep, but more than that I think it shows a glimpse of my attitude for life. Do it all, and do it all in as little time as possible.
The older I get, the more screwed up I realize this idea is. I mean honestly, what is the rush?
Last week, after a lot of thought and prayer, I returned back to school for the first time in 5 years. I felt like the oldest person on campus as I made my way up the hill to class. But somewhere in the midst of hip college kids, I knew I was different. I was a different girl. I was different from the college student who just wanted to get as many units done as soon as possible. I was different from the girl who tried to rush in and out of class without being noticed by anyone. I actually was thankful to be there and excited to see what God had in store for me in the journey. I no longer felt rushed or eager to check this off my list. I had come to know the value there is in taking my time and enjoying the ride.
There's something so unique about returning to the world of education after you have had some time in the working world. Experience teaches you so much. And more than anything else I think experience teaches you that there's no rush to get anywhere. The lists will always be there, it's how you cross things off that really matters!
Yes, I am going back to school with a goal in mind. And I will work everyday to accomplish that goal. But I am no longer working just to cross it off my list. I am working to learn, to grow, and to experience the glory God has to reveal to me. I'm ok with slowing down. I'm ok with taking my time. I'm ok with keeping that goal on my list for awhile.
When I go to a restaurant to eat, I want to eat every last drop of food on my plate! I cannot just let it sit there in front of me. But I am starting to realize I do not have to consume everything in a matter of minutes just because I have that option. I can return my plate to the waiter half full or save the leftovers for later.
And I think sometimes that's how it can be with us and TIME too! There are times when it is ok to just cross off the little tasks. But, there are also days when God asks us to linger with them. Linger with our prayer, linger with our desires, and linger with our goals. Why? So we can go deeper. So we can trust further. So we can let God reveal more of His goodness to us in them. Sometimes we have to leave the food on the plate and just let it be in front of us.
Time is one of our most precious gifts. But what is time worth if we are always rushing? We get so selfish with our time. We want to use as much of it as possible to squeeze in as much as we possibly can. But what if all God is asking us to do is just be present and wait? What if He is just asking us to slow down and linger in the time He has given us?
Are we overindulging in our time? Or are we using it wisely to let God in? There's a season for everything. We all have stuff to do. But we can over consume busyness. Slow down for a second and give God back some of your time.
We can keep crossing things off our lists, and rush through life, but we might miss the meal of a lifetime if we don't slow down to enjoy it!
How can you go deeper, linger more, and let God reveal His love to you over time?
Love and prayers,
Danielle
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