Fight.

and as the women were terrified and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, “Why do you seek the living One among the dead?" Luke 24:5 

Pretty in pink. Bows. Dresses. And all that glitter. Unfortunately, the life of a girl is never that simple. Amidst the sweltering sun and Monster High dolls, I was reminded of the very harsh reality of life as a female. 

What does it take to survive in this mean world of girlhood? 

There were only four of the blue tinted Barbie-like dolls, and five girls at the table. As they all called dibs on which doll they would be, it was inevitable that someone would be left out. But what broke my heart was how MEAN the girls all became as they singled out one girl for not being a part of the group. They taunted her. Told her mean things. And even as she tried to join in with another doll, they teased her about how ugly it looked. They were six and seven year olds and had already learned a harsh reality of life, one that I hated that they knew. But either, you keep up with the Jones' or you are going to be left behind. At least that is the lie we are all told. 

At first I just observed their behavior, wondering what would happen next. But the more mean they became, the more appalled I became, and the more compelled I was to step in. A conversation flowed from my intervening. They shared with me openly, discovering for themselves, and allowing me to discover, why we as girls do the things we do. 

The third grader said it best, "We fight with each other all the time because we just want the boys to like us the best." 

These girls were already fighting for the attention of the opposite sex. They fought about who got to play with what, who sat where, and who was friends with who all in the effort to get the boys to notice them apart from the crowd. They had, there on the playground, orchestrated their very own miniature world. A world in which being authentic, and smart, and kind really got you nowhere. They had created a world in which to get ahead, you pushed others down. It was a world that looked all too familiar to the one we live in and a world that found lives being lived for fleeting and false happiness. 

And the saddest part about that world I saw was that it was a world that we grow up in and never leave. 

All these girls wanted, all our hearts long for, is love. We search over and over to find those things, people, and moments that make us feel like we are special. We want to be adored. And for most of us ladies, we seek that sense of worth, and being worthy, in the opposite sex. And so we spend our whole lives competing to be as pretty or as smart, as funny or as cool as the next girl. And in our effort to keep up, we begin to let go of who we are as beautiful, gifted, and unique women. 

It plaques all of us. There is no denying that you partake in the competition in your own life. Maybe you no longer have to fight for the attention of the boys, but in all of us their is that longing to keep up with the best. Maybe you compete in your Pinterest like parties, or with your million dollar wardrobe. Maybe you shine on social media or outdo the rest by your extreme vacations. But the truth is, all of us have, at some time or another placed the net of our worth in some sort of worldly recognition. 

What made me so sad about the girls that played together that day was that they were destroying the hearts of each other to earn an unfulfilling happiness. And the worst part was I saw the same truth existing in my own world of adults. We will do anything, it seems, to one-up another if it means even the most temporary happiness. The boy, the job, the dress; none of those things will satisfy our hearts if we do not first find our worth in the love of God. 

We can fight with each other until the bows and glitter are long gone, but it will not lead any of us closer to the love we seek. The only way I know to find complete happiness is in loving, despite the fact that I am not even close to the head of the social pack. Being mean might get you ahead for the time being, but being love is the only way to real success. I may never be as smart, or funny, or rich as Susie but, I will fight until the end to be as smart, funny, and rich in love as God intended me to be. 

Like I asked the girls that day, why are we fighting against each other, when we could be fighting for each other? Pursue God's love. When you grow alive in Him, it becomes natural to put the mean aside. And perhaps by loving each other, despite who has the looks, or brains, or perfect boyfriend, we might most absolutely discover the love of God. 

None of us can make it to Heaven on our own. Let's start fighting together.