Box of Chocolates

"Behold the handmaid of the Lord, be it unto me according to thy word." Luke 1:38

In the fifth grade, we collected our Dad's favorite quotes for a book for Father's Day. My dads was this..."Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." Forrest Gump 

Every Tuesday and Wednesday I eat salad with my coworkers. We hodgepodge together toppings of every delight and enjoy conversation and community at the small round and rickety table in our office kitchen. And then, after we have finished our bowls of cabbage and carrots, corn and cucumber, we go for what we treasure most...a bite of chocolate. 

The box of chocolates sits in a special drawer and we take it out after we finish dinner each night. Set in front of us, we stare. It's a mystery, what lies in the middle of each sweet treat. And we anxiously ponder, which one we want, which one has the caramel we are in the mood for, and what will happen if we get the wrong one.  And in those moments we play out the life is like a box of chocolates line to perfection...you really never know what you are going to get.

And so the question follows, should we just cut them all in half, so we know what's inside? To which my reply is a stern, "NO!"

What fun is that? The mystery is part of the goodness. The risk, the guess, the reaching out for something that's not guaranteed to have your favorite maple filling that's where the beauty lies...in the moment it surrender. Life is indeed like a box of chocolates.

Life is many things. It's crazy, and exciting, happy, sad, full of hope, disappointing at times, trying, rewarding and almost everything else in between. But I have come to know that life is only two things consistently, God's and uncertain. At least if you are doing it right. 

A few weeks ago I found an odd line on my pinky nail. I would have never thought to have it checked, but I have some wise people in my life. Today I am getting my nail biopsied for skin cancer. And the words alone can stop a girl in her tracks, not to mention the thought that the words could be a reality. 

And I cried real tears the moment I found out. I remember telling my friends and family about the possibility, to which some suggested it was unfair, or that God wouldn't punish me, or even asking why I wasn't more sad or upset about it. And I found myself thinking back to the box of chocolates...my life in which I never know what I am going to get. 

I was sad for a moment, in shock too. And then I found hope. I started to see the good this adventure could bring. I looked at the ways God could use it to make me brave. I considered how my story could help someone else. I realized the people I might meet on the journey or the love I might feel. Life is uncertain, always, but it's also always certainly what God has built us for and what God builds us through.

Sometimes people ask if we would want to see the end of our lives if we had a choice, or know how the story ends, read the last chapter? To which I reply a stern, "NO!" 

I do not want to know the future. And it's not because I'm scared of what the future might tell me or I do not think life might be easier if the path was always obvious. But to be honest, it's because I trust a God who has designed the best journey for me. And a huge part of that journey is mystery. 

Why are we so anxious to know how it ends? Or what's inside the candy? Why do we have to read the end before we work through the middle? Maybe it's because we are afraid that the chocolate we grab, or the life we lead, will be the fruity fill that we do not want to eat. Maybe this time it will be but, maybe the next piece you grab will be your favorite kind too! I do not consider myself very risky, at all. But I'll risk my pick of chocolate every time. Because I know, even when I unluckily select a fruity piece, the chocolate around it is still good! 

Isn't life the same... worth the risk if we are Christian and worth the risk if we are following Christ?  I did not know in my 30th year life would bring me a biopsy. And I could live everyday in fear, or what ifs, or whys...or I could press on and say thank you life for this sweet moment that could end up with my favorite filing or the worst kind of chocolate I know. But thank you, because either way it's life, it's chocolate, it's uncertain, and it's good because my life is God's. 

I would not undo any heartbreak, or joy, any risk or cautious step, because each one has led me to trust God more, know myself better, and let me pick my pieces delicately and with love, but without fear. There is no fear in love. Some things work, others do not but love always prevails...even when it looks like a chocolate covered cherry that you would rather just spit out. The flavor makes us better, stronger, and wiser. And it makes us more completely God's.

Life is uncertain. And there are two ways that could make you live; in total fear or in total surrender! 

  

I surrender because I know this truth, 9 times out of 10, when I do I get a piece of chocolate I really really love.