new LIFE!
“True love causes pain. Jesus, in order to give us the proof of his love, died on the cross. A mother, in order to give birth to her baby, has to suffer. If you really love one another, you will not be able to avoid making sacrifices.”
— Mother Teresa
Throwing up is my biggest fear. Ever since I spewed in the trash can in the third grade, in front of my peers, the thought of vomit makes me squirm. I literally panic whenever I feel the slightest form of nausea. This is why I refuse to eat anything that has the potential to be food poisoning, overdose on airborne when the flu goes around my work, and run the opposite direction when someone so as mentions the word barf. It's safe to say that I will do literally anything to avoid throwing up, even when I'm certain it's the only thing that will make me feel better.
So you can guess, as I texted my friend on Friday morning, I was panicked by her complaint of being nauseous. "Please don't puke," I thought as I convinced her she was fine. But later that day I got a text asking me to pray she would just throw up. She was miserable and desperately wanted to feel better. And she did! She continued to update me on her trips to the porcelain throne and we discussed everything horrible about vomiting. I hated it. I hated that she didn't feel good. And my mind automatically went back to similar times when I was suffering so much. I flashed back to times when my body rejected the very nutrients I consumed and I remembered wanting to curl up in a ball and, well for lack of better words, die.
I assume it was no coincidence that this all just happened to occur on Good Friday, a day when Christ suffered unbelievably for us. I believe nothing is coincidence, and as we continued to converse, God spoke to us, even amidst the sprints to the toilet. As she lied, miserable I am certain, my friend assured me that her suffering was nothing compared to what Christ endured for us. And I realized, puking, my worst case scenario, paled in comparison to the agony Jesus must of felt as He hung on the cross; sweat, blood, and life dripping from His beaten body. Barfing is awful, but it's only a small reminder of the pain Jesus endured on our behalf.
I don't know how, or when, or where our conversation turned to pregnancy, but it did. And we started talking about how much being pregnant could potentially suck. I mean, being nauseous, that's kind of part of the deal. We joked about our future husbands buying us jewelry in exchange for our suffering and rubbing our backs as we would empty the contents of our breakfast into a bowl. But all joking aside, there was, at least on my part, a new perspective on suffering when I looked at it through the eyes of a mother.
I found myself, personally, connecting with the whole story of Easter. Why did Christ suffer on the cross? Why did He endure horrendous pain? Why didn't He stop it? Why? Well, Easter morning every year, we are reassured why. Christ endured the cross because it brought NEW LIFE. The cross alone is suffering, but it's victory is proclaimed in the resurrection! My life, my very purpose, was found in those very moments; death on the cross and life as a result.
What a beautiful gift that we get to share in the smallest portion of that suffering? My fear of puking has me over thinking things sometimes, but suddenly, in the face of new life, it seemed like the least I could do. From the moment I can remember, I'm certain that God created me to be a mother. And if His will so be it, I would be beyond blessed to suffer every single pain as I share in His creation of new life. I realized that the suffering would be on behalf of something so much more beautiful than I could even imagine. And when you love someone, like a parent loves their child, you would suffer anything for their well being. Christ did not hang on the cross for nothing. He suffered for one very thing, His children. He suffered for love. He suffered for love of us and for the gift eternity. He recognized that even in the middle of anguish, there was a bigger plan. His agony was the beginning of our very lives.
Today, we find joy in Christ rising from the dead! Today, all our suffering takes on new meaning. Today, we find new life. So whatever it is that causes you suffering; an illness, an addiction, or that darn morning sickness, hold out hope that in all suffering God is creating something new. Death does not have the final say. Life wins. And suddenly, when you realize that, you're willing to endure anything, even puke, for the beauty of new life!
— Mother Teresa
Throwing up is my biggest fear. Ever since I spewed in the trash can in the third grade, in front of my peers, the thought of vomit makes me squirm. I literally panic whenever I feel the slightest form of nausea. This is why I refuse to eat anything that has the potential to be food poisoning, overdose on airborne when the flu goes around my work, and run the opposite direction when someone so as mentions the word barf. It's safe to say that I will do literally anything to avoid throwing up, even when I'm certain it's the only thing that will make me feel better.
So you can guess, as I texted my friend on Friday morning, I was panicked by her complaint of being nauseous. "Please don't puke," I thought as I convinced her she was fine. But later that day I got a text asking me to pray she would just throw up. She was miserable and desperately wanted to feel better. And she did! She continued to update me on her trips to the porcelain throne and we discussed everything horrible about vomiting. I hated it. I hated that she didn't feel good. And my mind automatically went back to similar times when I was suffering so much. I flashed back to times when my body rejected the very nutrients I consumed and I remembered wanting to curl up in a ball and, well for lack of better words, die.
I assume it was no coincidence that this all just happened to occur on Good Friday, a day when Christ suffered unbelievably for us. I believe nothing is coincidence, and as we continued to converse, God spoke to us, even amidst the sprints to the toilet. As she lied, miserable I am certain, my friend assured me that her suffering was nothing compared to what Christ endured for us. And I realized, puking, my worst case scenario, paled in comparison to the agony Jesus must of felt as He hung on the cross; sweat, blood, and life dripping from His beaten body. Barfing is awful, but it's only a small reminder of the pain Jesus endured on our behalf.
I don't know how, or when, or where our conversation turned to pregnancy, but it did. And we started talking about how much being pregnant could potentially suck. I mean, being nauseous, that's kind of part of the deal. We joked about our future husbands buying us jewelry in exchange for our suffering and rubbing our backs as we would empty the contents of our breakfast into a bowl. But all joking aside, there was, at least on my part, a new perspective on suffering when I looked at it through the eyes of a mother.
I found myself, personally, connecting with the whole story of Easter. Why did Christ suffer on the cross? Why did He endure horrendous pain? Why didn't He stop it? Why? Well, Easter morning every year, we are reassured why. Christ endured the cross because it brought NEW LIFE. The cross alone is suffering, but it's victory is proclaimed in the resurrection! My life, my very purpose, was found in those very moments; death on the cross and life as a result.
What a beautiful gift that we get to share in the smallest portion of that suffering? My fear of puking has me over thinking things sometimes, but suddenly, in the face of new life, it seemed like the least I could do. From the moment I can remember, I'm certain that God created me to be a mother. And if His will so be it, I would be beyond blessed to suffer every single pain as I share in His creation of new life. I realized that the suffering would be on behalf of something so much more beautiful than I could even imagine. And when you love someone, like a parent loves their child, you would suffer anything for their well being. Christ did not hang on the cross for nothing. He suffered for one very thing, His children. He suffered for love. He suffered for love of us and for the gift eternity. He recognized that even in the middle of anguish, there was a bigger plan. His agony was the beginning of our very lives.
Today, we find joy in Christ rising from the dead! Today, all our suffering takes on new meaning. Today, we find new life. So whatever it is that causes you suffering; an illness, an addiction, or that darn morning sickness, hold out hope that in all suffering God is creating something new. Death does not have the final say. Life wins. And suddenly, when you realize that, you're willing to endure anything, even puke, for the beauty of new life!
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